A Brick Wall

There are reasons we've not shared an update on our adoption for some time.  Up until 2.5 weeks ago it had more to do with lack of "solid" news in our case.  We heard in early December that it looked like we would have a referral of a boy from Ethiopia within 1-3 months, and while we were ecstatic we didn't feel we should say much until we saw movement in the program and it seemed that our case was moving forward.

Then one month turned to two, and a couple of weeks later (less than three weeks before that 3 month "deadline") we found out there was an update.

But it turns out we hit a brick wall.

There were no referrals of children under 3 years old in our agency's Ethiopia program and they didn't know when or if there would be in the foreseeable future.


Even though we could stick with Ethiopia, we were encouraged to seek out additional adoption paths in order to build our family.

We were stunned.  At first we kept thinking that THIS couldn't be happening!  While there were no absolute guarantees, international adoption was supposed to be more of a "sure thing" than domestic adoption.  It was supposed to be less risky.   Of course, this was not the reason we chose to go down this road, but it was one factor that we thought would help vindicate the long, seemingly endless wait- that there WOULD be our Ethiopian son at the end of it.  Turns out, that might not be the case after all.

We've had a couple of weeks now to pray, cry a little, step back, think (perhaps more than we should) and talk.  While we are deeply sad that our adoption journey might not lead to a son in Ethiopia, we are not giving up on adoption.

We know that while infertility started us on this crazy road, God has genuinely changed our heart along the way, and now we cannot imagine NOT adopting!  If I were to get pregnant tomorrow, we would be dreaming about when and how our adopted child(ren) would also come into our family.  We are different people than when we began on this path just over two years ago.

As for where this path is taking us???  We wish we had the answer to that question ourselves...

Right now, we are remaining on the waiting list to adopt from Ethiopia rather than switching to another country that our agency has a program with.  We have believed for so long that our first child would come from this country that countless hours have been spent in prayer, dreams, and conversation reflecting just that.  So for now, we are not ready or willing to remove our dossier from the Ethiopia program as there is still the possibility that referrals of young children could become available.

We are praying about additional adoption opportunities, but feel no certainty and have made no decisions about which direction to go.  In many ways we feel that are starting from square one.  

If you know us and love us (or even like us!) we would REALLY appreciate your prayers for direction and wisdom that only the Lord can give.  We desire His grace and peace to make it through this rocky season.    

We have been beyond blessed by family and friends walking this journey with us even amidst the many "downs" of this road.   THANK YOU for sticking with us and believing along with us that God has a plan for our family!  Sometimes it's so hard to see when you feel like you are staring up at a big brick wall, but we choose to trust that this is just a change of direction and will lead to THE child that the Lord has for our family.